Giving talks on any subject can be a difficult proposition, particularly one as potentially misunderstood (or even divisive for some people) as Transgender Equality. Throw in having any kind of social media profile, where people can add comments to your wall, or message you directly and the opportunity for some truly jaw dropping moments seems to exponentially increase . Here are some of my “favourites” from 2018 so far…..
Talks and Presentations
- Why should I believe there are more than two genders ? Reply – What do you get from only believing there are two ?
- What does Trans stand for ? Reply – I don’t think its an abbreviation, but if it is I would imagine it stands for Respect, Diversity and Equality.
- Surely Trans women aren’t real women ? I’m with the Turds on this. Reply – I think you mean TERFS, but I get your point.
- Why should you be able to use the Women’s toilet ? Reply – Because it will save me having to pee or poop over your shoes here. Please excuse me, I REALLY need to go !!!!
- You say Trans people are statistically more likely to commit suicide than any other marginalised group, but I’ve known 5 people who’ve committed suicide and none of them were Trans what do you say about that ? Reply – I’m sorry for your statistically anomalous losses.
- Can you get me Paris Lees phone number ? Reply – No, sorry, maybe you could email her agent ?
- Do you have to buy special makeup for men ? Reply – Not unless men want it as a present. Otherwise I just buy and use the same as you do.
- So, you’re a Tranny ? Reply – No, you’re confusing me for a Ford Transit Van, but when I wear white, I can understand how you might think that.
- Do you watch Orange is the New Black ? Reply – yes, but only the ones with Laverne Cox in, otherwise I find it’s not true to life for me.
- Turn out for tonight’s talk has been lower than we expected so we can’t afford to pay you, would you like a free row of tickets for the raffle instead ? Reply – That’s really kind of you, but gambling is a demerit in Buddhism, so I’ll have to respectfully pass.
- What have LGBT people ever done for me ? Reply – We’ve given you the word “F-A-B-U-L-O-U-S “ daghlingk and a standard for it to live up to.
- Are your parents disappointed with how you’ve turned out ? Reply, I don’t know, since I outed myself to them, they’ve passed away so arguing with them about it has become a lot harder.
(I do get invited back though. Sometimes)
- Do you like Dick ? Reply – I don’t know anyone called Richard, sorry. I’m sure if I met him and got to know him, I might.
- Are you gay ? Reply- Yes, In England gay is just another word for happy though. Are you ?
- Will you marry me ? Reply – No. Never in a million years, because I’m a once in a lifetime woman.
- Do you do Cam work ? Reply -No, I am a makeup artist and cannot manufacture any form of mechanical timing or actuation device.
- Are you flirting with me ? Reply – No. Just NO
- Can I have your number ? Reply – yes 5.
- Do you know Farrah Mills, can you get me her number ? Reply, no, we’re friends and I couldn’t do that to her.
- Can I call you Cindy ? Reply – no, I like my name just fine thankyou.
- Do you like S&M ? Reply, Yes, their bras aren’t just any bras, they’re M&S Bras. I wouldn’t buy any others.
- Didn’t I hire you as an escort once in London ? Reply – Probably not, I don’t do impersonations of cars from the 1980s.
- Would you like to see my cock ? Reply, no, I’m a vegetarian, Poultry has no interest for me.
- If I sent you underwear would you wear it and then return it unwashed ? Reply, no No NO NO NO !!!! Ewwww !!!
- Show me your tits. Reply – Sorry, I don’t have any pets, feathered or otherwise.
- How much for sex ? Reply – more than you can afford since it would cost me my dignity.
- Can I cum round ? Reply – Corners ?!??!?
(funny how when you report these, they are seen not to violate “Community Standards” – what community ?!!?!!)
Would love to know what your own experiences have been !! Drop a comment and join in !!!